Nomad With A Nest

Originally Posted December 2, 2013

Today's blog is all about lifestyle and business design and getting to the root of the root of what I want my ideal life and work to look like. If I woke up tomorrow and was free to do anything I wanted with my life and my time, what would I do and who would I be?

That's easy: A little bit of everything.

Like most entrepreneurs and people with big ideas...I have more than one. I have more like 879 new ideas in a given week. Granted most of them are crap, but some of them could be that golden nugget that leads to considerable success, world domination, fame, fortune, and an unlimited supply of twizzlers (without getting fat and without the terrible health repercussions, of course).

But being an ideas person isn't enough. The most successful people, the rock stars, the people we look to for inspiration, motivation, and advice...those people get shit done. Every. Single. Day.

They are work horses. They work harder AND smarter than anyone else and they are relentless. RELENTLESS.

And most importantly, they don't let fear and self-doubt paralyze them from action and making magic happen.

So if I could do anything with my life and career, the first thing I would do is

1. Overcome all my fears and self-doubt.

This has to be the hardest thing for me as an entrepreneur. I seem to constantly compare my company to competitors, my skills to other CEOs, my experience to the Founder success stories I see everywhere. And each time I make those comparisons, I never measure up. And then that nasty feeling of failure and that nagging negative talk of "you should just quit. go get a normal job. you're not cut out for this" starts up. And it feels terrible.

And worst of all it makes that "get shit done," relentless pursuit of goals and business objectives that much more daunting. It's like climbing a flight of stairs after running a marathon. It just seems futile, cruel, and impossible.

So if I could do anything, the first thing I would do to design a life and business I love would be to turn that negative self talk and fear of failure into momentum, positive mojo, and a relentless "get it done" attitude. Of course, none of this would guarantee success or remove all my fears, but there's just something powerful about running headfirst into big scary obstacles knowing that you could fail, but damnit, you gave it every ounce of yourself. And sometimes that is the success: just trying and putting the full force of your unique talents, knowledge, and will behind your dreams.

2. A nomad with a nest.

One of the most important things I've discovered about myself the past few years is that I love home. I love that amazing "sigh of relief" feeling as you walk through your front door with a battered old suitcase after a long journey and time away from home. I like having my cozy bed, a fully stocked kitchen where I can experiment with new recipes. I like having a stock pile of wine...just in case the apocalypse happens. ;) I like hot showers, cozy slippers, my back patio, a desk with office supplies, and a big dining room table where my friends can gather for warm meals, craft beer, and lots of laughs.

I love home.

I also need and thrive in the routine and schedule that comes from having a home base. 5.30am Yoga 6.45am Gym 9am Work 6pm Start dinner 8pm Watch a movie/Read a Book/Learn something! 10pm Bed

Oh the glorious power of a routine.

But here's the trouble. As much as I love everything I described above...about 3-4 weeks of this and I think I might pull my hair out. I need adventure! I need spontaneity. I need airports, and train stations, and hotels/hostels, and random conversations with strangers, and foreign languages, and immigration check points. I need the awesome and humbling feeling of being completely lost and not knowing the language in a far of place I can discover for the first time.

I need to be a nomad...with a nest.

For me, even with a significant other, I can't see living in one version of life or the other. I want a cozy place to come home to and kickass suitcase to take me on regular adventures. And I need a business and a career that not only tolerates this type of existence, but also thrives from it. I want to be able to go spend 3 months living in Melbourne, or a month traveling around Italy, or 10 days in Alaska, or an extended stay back in Kansas with my family to experience things like this:

I want to to enjoy every last drop of those experiences...and then come home to a comfortable place to rest my head, cook a nice meal, and share ridiculous tales of my adventures with the ones I love the most.

Maybe I kind of want everything. The best of both worlds. Well...hell yes I do!

But maybe if I don't go after this big hairy goal (sidebar: why must big goals be hairy)- maybe I'm wasting these amazing gifts of time, place, and circumstance I've been given if I DON'T run head first into a dream, a lifestyle I love?

3. No debt. No guilt. And book it now.

You can't talk about lifestyle design and business aspirations without talking about money. Oh money money money. Clearly everything I described above has a price. Mortgages, housewares, suitcases, plane tickets, hotels, internet surcharges...it's all got a price and it's all a necessity if I want to be a nomad with a nest.

I have friends who have specific amounts in mind when you ask them what financial success means to them. I don't. I have no number. I just know general feelings and emotions I want to experience whenever money and purchasing decisions come up.

First. I know I don't want any debt (except maybe a mortgage). I grew up in a home and family that had very limited means. Even if my mom wanted to have a ton of credit card debt and put us in a lifestyle that reflected it, I don't think it would have been physically possible for her to do it. I think any time she pulled out one of those magical plastic cards to charge an unneeded item, some scary monster would fly out of her pursue and scare the ba-jeezous out of her.

So she only used her debit card/cash for purchases, balanced her check book every month, and taught me to do the same. If the cash isn't in your account, then it doesn't exist. "Credit" is a mystical idea from a far off land where "rich people" live...at least that's basically what I was raised to believe. And my family...we are most definitely not rich people. So I want to create a business and lifestyle that allows me to pay off my student loan debt (shakes fist in air!) and never need to accrue that kind of debt again.

Second. I want to have enough money so that I can stop feeling guilty when I buy something. I'm a cheap frugal person. I don't wear designer anything, my most expensive piece of jewelry is a $15 necklace from Target, and I live a modest life. So when I do want to splurge on something nice, I don't want to have that nagging feeling of living beyond my means. Everything in moderation. Including moderation. Right? I don't want a mansion, sports cars, to fly first class everywhere in the world, or stay at the Four Seasons. I just want a modest life, with modest means, and no guilt.

Third. Kind of related to the no guilt thing. I want to book it now. I definitely don't want to live hand to mouth. Within my means, yes, but with enough socked away for emergencies (both the fun and the not so fun kind) where I can "book it" at a moments notice. This also means that I want an income that allows for generosity...a lot of it. Charitable giving? Of course. But also the generosity of having enough moolah to take my niece on her first trip abroad some day. To send my nephew to an amazing summer wrestling camp (if that's what he wants). To take my parents on an Alaskan adventure. To sponsor a scholarship for another little Kansas farm girl to go discover the world. Whatever it is, I want to have the ability to book reasonable things and experiences that could change my life or someone else's...and book them now.

But it's hard to be generous when you're in debt, feeling guilty, and you just don't have enough. So that's the goal. To give without hesitation.

Is there a number I could attach to all this? I'm sure there is. But I'd rather not. I just know how I want to feel...and I'll know it when I get it.

4. Get out of the way.

"In most cases being a good boss means hiring talented people and then getting out of their way." -Tina Fey

I don't want to manage people. Not a lot of people. I used to think I wanted to create a big company with several employees, an office, office supplies, conference rooms, the whole big "I own a company" package. But it's not for me. I need #2 on this list more than I need an office with a big payroll. I need freedom more than I need a ton of money. And I need small projects I can play a roll in rather than a big operation where I spend more time "managing, approving, feed-backing, performance-reviewing" than anything else.

Of course I want financial independence, my 'nomad with a nest' lifestyle, and a business that is "successful." But that success isn't going to look the same for everyone...and having a big team does not define success for me. I want a small and mighty team, a petite group of talented rock stars that can make magic happen. No more. No less. I want to nurture them, advise them, enable them...and then get out of the way and let them sparkle. And then I want to get back to my own work of creating and contributing.

Small, but mighty. That's success. For me at least.

5. Matter.

This one is probably the most emotional of all my "lifestyle and business design" goals. And it gets to the core of my deep, deep understanding of how totally freaking lucky I am and how amazingly blessed I've been in my life. As hard working and self-sufficient as I have always been, no one does anything completely on their own. Whether it was an encouraging word from my mom, a $20 bill slipped into my purse by my grandma, or a boss taking a chance on me because I had potential but no real experience...I've been helped at every stage of my life by someone else whether they knew it or not.

And that brings me back to the big scary goal of mattering. I want to contribute something to the world that impacts people in a positive way. I want to, in some small (and maybe even big) way matter to the course of someone's life. I want a legacy of helping people...some how. I have special talents. I have a mind that is capable of thinking, creating, and doing great things. And I want those gifts to mean something positive for this world...and hopefully last a lot longer than my tiny speck of existence in the course of history.

We are all finite. We all have an expiration date. But our legacies and what we can give to others do not expire. They can live on - hopefully for the better.

My challenges are 1) figuring how I can bring positive change to the world and 2) achieving it along with goals one through four.

Here's to running head first into big hairy goals...without fear, doubt, hesitation, or shame.

Cheers,
Brooke